16 Jul Anthony “Three Fingas” Abundanzo Sets Betting Line in SLAMT1D’s 14th Annual Vermont Summer Classic
Anthony “Three Fingas” Abundanzo Sets betting Line in SLAMT1D’s 14th Annual Vermont Summer Classic
Brooklyn’s Top Bookie drops the latest line for 2025 tournament
Brooklyn, NY-July 2025
“C’mon, youz kiddin’ me? Thirty-two teams this year? Business is boomin’ down here but I gotta do this here thing up there to get back some dough from last year. Laid down three stacks on them Staten Island Yankees in the semis for a nice W, but got busted out goin’ for it all with them Heartbreak Kids. Madon! This year I’m bringin’ in my cousin Benny “The Scout” Mancino. They say he’s got good contacts this kid. Here’s what I got, everything’s straight up no spreads:
So youz know, I had my guy Patsy “Norwalks” Tiriolo link all these here teams to them fundraiser pages. Youz wanna do somethin’ good, hit them links and donate!
Boston Terriers: They laid a beatin’ on everyone until them Heartbreak Kids put the Sleeper hold on ‘em in the playoffs. Offseason they re-signed the guy Fontana on condition he puts Red Bull in his cereal Sunday mornin’. He does, I got ‘em 2-1, Full Stop. Fuggedhabouddit! G’head, Go Home! He don’t? 6-1, I’m layin’. G’night!
Ultimate Warriors: New team, spun off from them Dugout Dawgs. Whatta they got, thirty players on that team, half of ‘em Carrien? Yeah, they’re Carrien somethin’. Word is they thought they were carryin’ them Dawgs! Goin’ with that, I’m takin’, 10-1.
Red, White & Brew: This here’s one of them subtraction through addition things I never got in school. They lose the real manager, that Rachel Booth, but they’re go in’ all in on some prospect for maybe 2035. You kiddin’ me? My goombah Billy D’s not sayin’ nuthin’ about it; no one’s sayin’ nuthin’. Church mice up there in New Hampshire. My cousin? Fuggedhabouddit, all he’s got for me on this one is “it’s on the bake”. I’m goin’ 8-1, layin’ one more time.
Polli Swingers: Swingin’ hammers, swingin’ from them rafters and ladders and had ‘em swingin’ at a lotta pitches last year, but what? How many runs? Oogatz, until that game against Da Bulls! Then they’re hammerin’ ‘em all over the place! I’m gettin’ the reports and I’m like, “What’s goin’ on over here with this team?” Lookin’ for consistency, some of that “chorenza”, ya know what I’m sayin? Hit it here, whack it over there next thing you got five runs and gazebo! That guy Tucker Polli, he’s an All Star. Put him in the four-hole, all done, “tutto fatto”. 10-1, takin’.
Novo Nordisk Da Bulls: This team, you kiddin’ me? The only thing they don’t bring, them guys Adams and Ternisky, is a band of buglers! That team’s huge! What, they had 47 players, a whole cheering section, a table over here, a tent over there…they’re all over the map this crew! People are askin’, “Could this be their year?” Yeah, it could. It could also be the year I win Lotto, Megabucks, Powerball and the Pick 3! My book don’t go no higher that 25-1, so 25-1 it is. Takin’, you serious?
NYL Vermont GO: “Frankie…Go down to that red Buick next to the hydrant; Paulie, run to that manhole cover and Johnny, just hike me the ball….you’re my safety valve I ain’t gonna throw it to you nohow.” I mean, “NYL Vermont GO”? Sounds like one of them plays we make up in the huddle. Benny says, “I dunno, it’s New York Life! I think “GO” is they’re gonna GO win this thing!” I’m tellin’ youz, I’m six teams in and I’m getting’ second thoughts on my cousin over here! New team, they got some players; even told some serious guy Pfaff he’s gonna have to sit! I’m goin’ 12-1…takin’. Gotta see what they got.
Baldwin Wiffleball: Second-year team. Pittsburgh. Aaron Rodgers may skip Training Camp to come play. They’re all in their twenties these guys, playin’ wiffle ball more than they’re schoolin’ or workin’. 1-2 last year? The guy Bechtold says they’ll be ready, should go deep. Benny says so, too. Heard somethin’ at Atria, that they we’re adjustin’. Yeah, OK. But, they do have a Ruggieri. That’s somethin’. They were 10-1 last year, 7-1 this year but still takin’.
Bush League Boys: Some big questions: Will them two Hamilton guys play again? Benny says this paisan Digiammarino is gettin’ recruited, but will he sign? And, word is some Lisa Bolduc-Bissell is gonna kick some butt if they don’t start winnin’. Is that part of the Bissell related to Bissell that’s related to Bissell? Dunno, but Benny says she’s serious business and they’re expectin’ a lot more this year. I’m goin’ 20-1.
Dugout Dawgs: That guy Knowles says they’re down to 25 players on the roster after sheddin’ some dead-weight. Benny says the team batting average is still under .157, but things are lookin’ up. I asked him how they’re lookin’ up and he says, “There ain’t nowhere else to go!” That ain’t real analysis but he’s got a point this guy. Stickin’ at 20-1.
Team Risely: First-year team. Benny says they got athletes and used to play wiffle ball in their backyard. I says to Benny, “Everybody played wiffle ball somewhere!” Then he says, “Yeah, but they built their own field!” Captain Trista Johnson told Benny, “We’re goin’ up there to win this thing! That Abundanzo guy better not bet against us!” Guess what? I’m settin’ the line at 18-1, and takin’ all the way.
The AWAA: Jimmy Cole’s gotta get his team to go deep this year! Home runs they got! Bing! Bang! Boom! Championship trophies? Phffft! Oogatz! I mean, these guys plate like a hundred runs in three games, and then they’re off for Sunday macaroni, meatballs and gravy over here! So’s I check with Benny, “These guys fugazi, or what? I’m droppin’ plates of ziti all over the place!” Benny tells me they’re comin’ heavy, they want that trophy the Staten Island guys got. They gotta be a favorite up there with them other teams. Too much power. I’m goin’ 5-1 layin’, with a real shot if they show up on Sunday.
Dunder Wifflin’: This team right here has got somethin’. Everything starts with Evangelo just because, ya know what I’m sayin’? Karelas, Peasley, the guy Leahy (ain’t he a senator or somethin’ up there?) and then whaddya gonna do, word is the toughest two of ‘em all is Chloe Witt and Johnny Wittout. Witt and Wittout I dunno, but that’s what Benny’s tellin’ me. I’m gonna set the line at 10-1 gotta be takin’ with this one.
Insulin Junkies: What’s this, a team of Vikings? Not one paisan in the bunch! They got Larssons, Sampsons, Petersens and Benny’s tellin’ me they changed everyone else’s names to this West, that Thurber, Kingston, Shaughnessy and a Kulawiec, which I got no clue about. Benny seen ‘em play in a game in some backyard and one of them Sampsons got LIT UP tossin’ meatball after meatball! First-year team includin’ players who didn’t get re-signed by their former teams. Openin’ at 10-1, and I’m takin’ on the Junkies. Bring it to me.
Bat Attitudes: I gotta be clear about this here. This is all youz gotta know before you think about droppin’ on this team: Tim Rahaim is their All Star. I’m in Brooklyn, Carroll Gardens and I could hear him from down here runnin’! Wheezin’ and cracklin’! And that’s just him gettin’ up to the plate! Madon! Meghan and Betty B are workin’ Lionel as fast as they can, but it ain’t gonna help this year! I seen him…I say two more years at his pace, he’s in. The lineup is wracked; Jones still isn’t ready even after some expert advice on how to straighten her back. They need my guy Caforia to come though. Uppin’ the line, 12-1 takin’ all day long.
Wild Wifflers: Benny can’t find nuthin’ on this team, but he knows the guy McKenzie, the captain. One of them achiever types. Been hangin’ around for years waitin’ to put a team into the thing. Gotta go with the guy’s patience, and keepin’ it tight-lipped. So, first-year team. Gotta see ‘em in action. Gonna open 20-1, takin’.
SB Wiffle: Fourth year. Chandler and his crew have been knockin’ for three years. A game here, wheelbarrow race there and this here team could’ve had their name on that trophy. But it ain’t. They got athletes all over the place. Had ‘em even last year, I’m sayin’ 5-1, layin’ with a shot.
Creekside Electric: Benny says rumors were swirlin’ they were tryin’ to get the Old Man Rahaim to play with Mara Southworth on maternity leave and Matt Rahaim off to learn how to herd yaks and build yerts in Alaska. I’m tellin’ youz this guy Wixson could have a breakout tournament just because he’s gotta. 15-1, takin’.
Farrell Distributing: How youz doin’? If these here win this thing, a few stacks at 125-1 could mean youz are in retirement early, know what I’m sayin’? Roberge says to Benny he’s got ringers. I says to Benny, “Ringers for what?” So he asks Roberge and Benny says me, “Oh yeah, Roberge says he got mixed up…he got ringers for a fishin’ tournament!” Ringers for fishin’? Fuggedhabouddit, I got no clue but lemme tell youz this: Farrell and Hawkins Bay top the fun charts for this thing! Yep, 125-1. Try Powerball.
Hawkins Bay Yacht Club: Benny says they’re inchin’ closer. I says, “To the title?” He says “Yeah!” I says, “You’re fired!” Ritz and Westenfeld did a good thing when they drafted the Cisco Kid, Kenny Douglas, but that ain’t gonna help the odds. Get your ticket to the After-Party. They win that hands down. I’ll give ‘em an inch or two closer, 75-1, takin’.
Burlington International Airport Griffins: New team. I thought it was a big family named Griffin, but Benny says it’s a thing with a lions body and eagle’s head with wings. Says they’re supposta fly real fast-like. Benny says them airport flights are all in the air way ahead of schedule so’s the team can practice usin’ them cones for bases. Solid. The guy Atwood is serious about winnin’ says Benny. I’m gonna open ‘em at 18-1, takin’.
Hallam-ICS: I still got no clue what’s “ICS”. The guy Abair’s the force behind ‘em. Been in the tournament years. Ain’t got a sniff of the trophy game yet, but they keep gettin’ after it. Thinkin’ the Saturday game versus them Griffins could be key. 20-1, takin’.
Lions Club Striders: I’m tellin’ youz right now, this here team is the dark horse. 100%! They’re close. Gillette and them Kovals with Jack Carney, Sheldrick elevatin’ the team. Fuggedhabouddit. I got ‘em 5-2, layin’.
The Gluebags: I had ‘em 2-1 to repeat last year. Throwin’ the ball around like it was one of them hot podaduhs and next thing, they’re barbequin’ and spectatin’. Benny says they didn’t re-sign the Sampson guy, and picked up this guy “Osso Bucco” Shanks. Benny says he can do stuff. Dunno about this team; one of them puzzlers. I’m pushin’ it out, 5-1, layin’ until Sunday.
Weekend Wifflers: You kiddin’ me? What’s with this guy Pion and all these free agents? He hasn’t hit on one yet so’s he brings in four of ‘em from Florida? Madonna mi! Benny says one of ‘em used to play first base for the Yankees, and another’s some high school phenom-type down there. Yeah, and I own the Brooklyn Bridge…this guy! The New York Yankees? Can you believe this guy? I tell my cousin, I says, “Benny, you gotta get me the real scoop on these things. It ain’t fantasy over here!” Mingya! Next, what? Seann Quinn’s gonna make the Six Million Dollar Man look like nuthin’? I’m goin’ 8-1, takin’ all day long.
O’Farrell’s GOATs: Powerhouse team but these last years they’re tryin’ ice baths, massage tables, some kind of group hummin’, burnin’ incense over in that Team Zone there. Benny says one team told him, “Yeah, they smell real nice, lob pitches and wanna hug ya on the bases!” O’Farrell says he’s had enough. “I’m done smellin’ like cinnamon and lavender! But if you want to join us at our Team Tent, we’ve got some great kambucha!” I go back and forth on this one here: stickin’ at 7-2, but takin’.
Electric City Heartbreak Kids: I’m like an accordion over here with this team! I go 3-1, up it last year 9-2 and I’m thinkin’ tightenin’ up this year. Last year they go oh-fer in games, get in the playoffs on PowerRankin’ and make the Championship Game. You kiddin’ me? Anthony and them are loaded with my paisans and I gotta hunch. I’m goin’ 4-1, takin’.
Dell Ave Devils: They’re up to 28 Murphys this team. Benny says they got some big additions. Seriously? More? Sean Murphy up from Florida. Benny says he saw him at some fire station swattin’ at flies, looked good. Benny thinks it’ll translate to wiffle. Then again, Benny ain’t so smart with translatin’. Last year they came close, like bocce close. They bolster their rotation, who knows with this crew. Youz can’t sleep on this team. They gotta shot. It’s a Drop Kick at 5-1, how youz doin’!
Staten Island Yankees: Them guys from that Other Burrough over there did it! 13th Annual Champs! Heard Tirone and Atwood were in the ICU for a week after gettin’ fluids! And Rigatti on third doin’ like Nettles! Fuggedhabouddit! And you gotta see them rings they got! Unbelievable! These Yankees gotta be heavy favorites to repeat. Even money with the defense. No doubt about it!
